The Case Against Google Maps

I don't travel by myself very much. Consequently, when I do travel by myself, I usually don't know how to get to where I am going. If you know me, you know that studying a map would not fall into the category of "my cup of tea." Luckily for people like me, there is such a thing as the internet. A lot of people like to use Google Maps to get directions. I used to be one of those people, but then I got tired of receiving faulty directions. Here are two instances (There are more instances, but I can't remember them. No, really. I'm not lying! (For real, though, I'm not lying)) of Google Maps failing.

In late December of last year (So, last December. Like 3 months ago), the Russell clan was having a family dinner. Like, big family dinner - aunts, uncles, cousins, etc. You get the idea. My dad was appointed, possibly by himself, as the dinner organizer. Not surprisingly, he picked a Chinese restaurant.* I was at my mother's house the night of the dinner, which meant I'd have to drive myself to the restaurant. As per the usual, I did not know how to get to said restaurant. I looked up the address and then got directions from my mom's house to the restaurant via Google Maps. I was a little skeptical of the directions as soon as I saw them. One of the steps in the directions was to make a U-turn. I'm no navigator, but I'm pretty sure U-turns are for when you've missed your turn. If you're putting U-turns in the directions, I feel like you're acknowledging that you suck at giving directions. The worst part is that the U-turn wasn't even necessary, but because I made the U-turn, I got lost. Instead of "make a U-turn at ____ Street," the directions should have said "turn left on _____ Street." Of course, since I followed Google Maps' directions, I was late. By a lot.

Two weeks ago, my mom and I went to a Timberwolves game (That's basketball). However, neither of us knew how to get to the Target Center (Where the Timberwolves play (Basketball)). My mom decided to take charge in finding directions, and did not adhere to my warning about Google Maps. Google's directions brought us to Target Field (Where the Twins play (Baseball)). Admittedly, that's actually pretty close to the Target Center (Basketball), but in reality, that's a horrible job of directioning.** Close only counts in horseshoes and hand grenades. And shoe-bocce. But NOT directions!

*I've noticed that my dad is really into Chinese stuff, especially their food. I'm trying to decide if this is because he and my step-mom adopted two boys from China, or if he's always been this way, and his lifelong enthusiasm for all things China is what led to the decision to adopt from there. I don't remember him being a huge Chinese food fan, so I'm thinking it may be the former.

**"Directioning" is a new word I made up. It means "giving directions." I didn't want to use "directing" because that reminds me of a director, either musically or businessally (Another word I made up - "pertaining to business"). "Directioning," I feel, clears up any confusion.