Wednesday, May 14, 2014


The other day I took a test. It was a test that I needed to pass in order to become a teacher. Since I signed a waiver saying I wouldn't talk about what was on this test, let's call this test the CRAXIS.

In the weeks leading up to the CRAXIS, I was trying to gain some knowledge on this test. I asked people who had taken it if it was comparable at all to the ACT. They said it was. I did pretty well on the ACT; I got a 30, not to brag or anything (that is completely to brag. I probably did better than you). I also didn't study for the ACT. Therefore, I decided I didn't need to study for the CRAXIS.

However, I was informed that there would be questions about theories and theorists, and if there's an area in teaching with which I am not confident, it is theories and theorists. I decided to go online to take a practice CRAXIS, mostly just to see how I would do, not to see what I should study. Unfortunately, there wasn't a practice test for the kind of CRAXIS I was taking. There was a "study companion," though. I figured this study companion could just study for me, since, if it were a person and was my study companion, that's what would happen. It didn't work that way, though. It wasn't even really a study thing. It just told me what would be on the CRAXIS. This was extremely convenient because that's all I really wanted to know, and I certainly did not want to study. On top of that, this study companion told me that the CRAXIS would consist of 90 multiple choice questions, none of which dealing with theories or theorists, and nothing else. That's right - only multiple choice questions. I could probably guess my way to passing it! I wouldn't need to, though, because everything not related to theories or theorists has now become a part of my very being.

The day of the CRAXIS finally came, and I didn't know where it was. I mean, I did, but I didn't. I had the address, but it was in Sioux Falls and I don't know how to navigate Sioux Falls. The fact that I didn't know where it was made me nervous - much more nervous than I was for the actual test because that was just going to be 90 multiple choice questions, none of which regarding theories or theorists.

Another thing about having the CRAXIS in Sioux Falls is that Sioux Falls has a Taco Bell. Now, I've been heard saying that I hate Taco Bell, but that was in my youth, when I was young and foolish. At this point in my life, I love Taco Bell. Eating at Taco Bell was second on my daily goals list, behind finding the place where the CRAXIS was going to be taken.

I found the CRAXIS place (Taco Bell was right on the way!) and walked up to the desk to check in. The lady gave me a waiver to sign saying I wouldn't reveal what was on the test. This was by far the hardest part of the CRAXIS because I had to copy an entire paragraph in cursive. I've written a post on cursive writing before, but I don't think it's on here, which is too bad because it was really good. Anyway, yeah, I can't remember how to write in cursive very well. The study companion said nothing about writing in cursive.

It only took me about 20 minutes to copy the paragraph with inventive cursive. I handed the lady the waiver and finished checking in. I was walked to my computer (this CRAXIS was online) and then left to complete the CRAXIS. There were a few screens of instructions, the last one told me what would be on the test. It said there would be 90 multiple choice questions, AS WELL AS THREE CONSTRUCTED-ANSWER QUESTIONS! "Constructed-answer" is just a fancy way of saying "essay," in case you were wondering. I figured I'd worry about those questions when I got to them. I got through the first few multiple choice questions pretty easily. I was working my way through the CRAXIS, thinking to myself, "Hey, at least there aren't any questions about theories and theor-OH COME ON!" A question near the beginning dealt with a theorist and his theory. There were a few others scattered throughout the test as well. What was the point of that study companion even existing? Do they want people to fail the CRAXIS? Who are they, even? THIS IS WHY I NEVER STUDY! It turned out, though, that the constructed-answer questions were the easiest, so the joke's on YOU, study companion.

After the CRAXIS, I indulged in the deliciousness of Taco Bell, and crossed everything off of my daily goals list.

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