Oh, Lordy. Little kids are my favorite people. About ten minutes ago, Liam, my seven year old brother, was talking to me. We were having a little conversation about football, which mostly consisted of him asking questions and me answering them in very simplified ways. When he ran out of football questions, he paused. Then said, quite randomly, "I wonder why He gave me a gap."
"Who gave you what gap?" I was confused. I mean, we were just talking about football, so I was thinking maybe a gap in zone coverage, or a gap as in a hole for the running back. But Liam didn't have either of those things.
"God, and the gap in my teeth."
"Oh, well, prob-"
"Oh I think I know why! He wanted to make me special. Well, super-special. Not just ordinary-special, like everyone else."
"That's right! He made you super-special instead of regular special by giving you a gap in your teeth."
"Wow. He wanted to give someone a gap in their teeth, and He chose ME...that's COOL!"
"Yeah, that is pretty cool."
"Yeah. And He gave Sam a peeing problem*, so he's special, too."
I was literally crying. I was trying my hardest to not laugh. I was half successful, so I had a huge smile on my face and was exerting a great amount of effort in my chortles and titters. Conversations with Liam are some of my favorite conversations. They are always both hilarious and adorable. Well, not always. Sometimes he taunts me, but I take care of that.
*Sam wets the bed. But he's only nine. That's hardly a peeing problem. For two reasons: 1. That's normal. Well, I'm no expert on children's bladder evacuation habits, but I'd assume it's not really a "problem." And 2. When I think of a "peeing problem," which is almost never (I'm not some sort of weirdo), I think of having a problem peeing. Which makes me mildly uncomfortable for some reason. Now seems like a good time to stop writing.